Tuesday, October 30, 2012

Old Friend's New Life (Transition to Couplehood)


A new beginning always beginning, starting with communication, known expectations, and understanding of what you are trying to achieve as a couple.  The list should be reviewed every year, change according to what has been achieved add new things of what you would like to achieve.  For the first year here is a list of 12 things you can do to ease the transition into couplehood.



It's after the wedding, you on your honeymoon, all the two of you can talk about was how wonderful the wedding was, how great your wedding planner was and how all the wedding plans came true.  Your guest were happy, you were happy you had fun.  Now it is all about the future and how wonderful your life will be together.  What is it really going to be like? 

A real dose of reality is when you get on the airplane to come home.  For some couples they come home to an overwhelming since of ....what would I call it?  Reality?  Panic?  The honeymoon is over what now?  For other couple it is more like the romance continues and they continue to grow their relations.  They were friends before the honeymoon they are friends afterwords.

Getting home from a honeymoon to all the day to day things can become somewhat challenging so here is a list of items you can do to help you adjust to your new lifestyle. Ease the stress of the everyday grind.  Back to work, back to life.  It's a little like going on vacation, everyone wants to know everything.  No matter what happened it is best to say wonderful things about your new spouse.  No need to open up the door for trouble.  Speaking highly of your new husband or wife helps you both work out any difference between you,  and keep it just between you.

1.  Find a place to live, before the honeymoon.  The best way is to find a place neither of you have lived in before so that their are no arguments about how to do things.  No reminders of past loves, etc. You are both starting with the same playing fields.

2.  Unwrap gifts that are delivered prior to the wedding.

3.  Send a thank you card to the people the gifts are from. (These can be ordered at the same time your invitations are order with from Mr. & Mrs. or Love, Mr & Mrs.  whatever the saying your would like) 
Then all you have to do is write thank you for the ......  If you are having an opening up the wedding gifts together party after the honeymoon, do it in your new place.
                                                                                   
4. Be sure to make a list of all gifts and person who gave it to you so you have a reference when you see them and they ask you did you like the gift we gave? Highly recommend you keep the list close for the first year. If you know you are going to see the people who you can refer to it prior to seeing them.
                                                                                                        
5. Try to move all your items that you want to keep to your new joint residence a month prior to your wedding. Decide who is going to live there.





6. Live in your own residence as long as possible, a week prior to the wedding the bride or groom should move into the new residence.  This way only one resident will have to be closed after your honeymoon.                                                                                                           

7. Donate any item that is the littlest argument (or big ones for that matter).  You are both starting a new life and if "he didn't like" or "she didn't like it.  It doesn't belong".

8. Your new life together is about the two of you.  The first year should be all about you two and planning for a life together.

9.  Get your finances in order.  Set goals.  (Met with a financial planner, insurance person to help you achieve your goals.)
I know this sounds silly but if you have you want children consider opening up a savings account.  There is a cost to having children, if you didn't have to spend the savings then it is a nice beginning to a college fund.  After the first is born do the same for the next one.  It doesn't have to be allot each month just something your financial planner can help with the details.  You do not have to be rich to have a financial planner.



10. Know and trust that transitions are normal, be patient, kind with one another.  The first year can be the reminder of all future anniversaries so make it fun.

11.  Slowly invite your friends over to see your new home, sometimes friends have difficulties with changes in you and the new you.  Know that this is also normal.  Try to love them through it, if they can't adjust then they will choose to fade out of your life.  Don't fight about it.  Your true friends are truly that, they will remain friends as you transition into marriedhoodness. 

12.  Don't forget to take time to be an individual.  There might be things you both love doing together but it is okay to have private interest.  As long as you are not violating the marriage vows then, enjoy the company of your friends.


                                                            

Monday, October 29, 2012

Point of Reflection

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls

Maybe  there are some Diamond Glamour Guys out there don't mean to discount you.  As I set in my office reflecting over this years events I ponder, how did I get from writing about events, glamour, fashion to writing about my personal life.  Watching all the birds, fly sing and say a whole lot of nothing.  Oh now I know, I went through major changes in my life.  Children, grown and in college, other child at work.  My husband of my youth choose another.  Many changes in a short amount of time leaves a woman face with many decisions and the reality that if you are not for me then you are against me so get out!  My dad would always tell us that growing up.  We would laugh and then obey him.  We loved our father.  A father of only daughters has to put up with allot.  Especially form the men they bring home.  Funny but signal moms don't get to met the girls until they are ready to marry them.  That is where I am blessed.  Both my son's love me to meet all their friends.  They love spending time with me.  They love bringing them over for dinner.  I love having them over and making all the gourmet dishes I have my clients try. I love cooking for my two sons.  I have always loved creating dishes just for them and giving them silly names.  I love being a mom.  It is the biggest blessing (gift), God gave me.

I still love making appointments, with my clients and listening to their excitement in their voice as they explain their their goals, their budgets, their excitement over their special day.  The reason I love listening to them is because I know it didn't just start with moment and time they are speaking to me about.  It started years before.  God's plan is always greater then our own.  If you own a business "He" knew years ago what it would be like today.  If, you were getting married, "He" exactly who you would marry, why, how many children you would have and how successful you would be.  So no worries.  That is what I learned starting schools for other companies in my youth.  Being a marketing director you learn that "He" always knows what we are about.  What we are praying for even when we don't find the words to pray.  Even when we are broken beyond repair.   

Let's face it the day doesn't just start with a day.  For a wedding it starting the moment their eyes met.  For other events is much more practical.  A celebration, a time, a message they want to get across.  Helping your business, wedding, event be successful means I get to celebrate with you.  I get to rejoice when you do.  I am blessed just by meeting some of the people you know.  Did you know that we can have all the greatest things in life, but if you don't see the people around you as a blessing then what is the point? 

Okay, so all these major changes in my life knowing that my sons are now young me, that my life has gone under major change has left me with the desire to be myself to the end.  I remember a story once I told my children about a woman, who knew a spirit once that desired nothing good for her.  She would pray constantly.  She went through major crises, at a young age she saw people fighting outside her house, she saw riots, she was bet up in spirit and in life, she was raped as a 13 year old in spirit, and her rapist came back to do it for real in life, when she got older.  That is when life changed.  Her rapist was caught and held in prison, his wife found out the truth about what he (her husband did to women not only in spirit but in truth).  How he isolates you to victimize you, he had to confess it all to those around him.  He then has to make amens.  She just might have gotten her name cleared, her love back, her holidays restored, celebrations and memories left to those that love her (but she remembers everything). Her business name, reputation, and respect from her peers.  Her children, and their children to respect her and an apology for her husband who left her for another.

 Making sure they believed in the power of prayer! "He" exist. At that point that woman who prayed so much believed again that you can and will be held accountable for your actions on earth in spirit and  in truth.  It is what her dad taught her.  It's not just in the "Bible" but it is how we treat those we love, and those that want more than they should have.  She just might been a worshiper, a music teacher, a pastors daughter or two, a preachers mother, a preachers wife's sister in Jesus, a preachers sister, a teachers prayer partner, a sister, a mother, a daughter, your best friend, she just might be with you today praying for you, and most of all a respectful person in spirit and truth, who knew how to love without hurting those around her.  Just making sure they believed in the power of prayer!  "He" exist.  "It's a Diamond Occurrence!" 
Are you ready for a diamond occurrence in your life?


Friday, October 26, 2012

"Grace"



The ratings seem to be us since I am purely writing about gossip.  Gossip is one of those things women love, men claim they hate it, but do it all the time.

Here is the deal with GRACE, yes for some, it is a woman's name, for some it is a way of life.  I attended a church once and I don't want to mention it by name so I will whisper it  (horizon christian fellowship aka horizon.org  "I whisper because I don't want people to think me religious' (LOL) I work with clients of many different faiths.)  where the Pastor at Horizon Christian Fellowship  believed in grace.  I Horizon Christian Fellowship there after being broken from serving at another church that will remain nameless. "He" helped me with the pain from point of grace. Something I will never forget.  I learned to show grace to other, okay, I might have already known how to do this, but his words comfort his congregation, because of who he is.  It is not so much that he is put on a pedestal, or that I worship him as a Pastor.  More because I learned at his church that prayer doesn't need to be pained.  That grace really does exists.  Healing really does happen and "Forgiveness" is not just a word it is a way of being, a way of treating others and a way to show Grace.  We can live a prayerful life without being pained constantly.

How do I use it today?  I try to live the life my own dad taught me.  My dad taught me respect for the "Father".  To this day, even though I know their is nothing left of my youth or my dad, he died many years ago, I try not to depart from His ways.  He taught me that to be human is to error.  To be a woman is to be, hummm... what we think of ourselves.  To have self respect.  To trust ourselves and to make our No's be NO.  I know many of us say no, but at his insistence we summit.  There is that fine line when we say no and then submit, some of us so that life will be well within others, or ourselves because we just don't know any better.  But like Oprah says you "When you know better you do better."  It is my favorite quote.  Grace is something we all should learn in a marriage. What the place mentioned above taught me...is life continues no matter what, we try, the "Lord" will help.  He will never leave us nor beseech us.  Right?

MK Pure Diamond Events
Plans Great Weddings
Within a marriage, relationship or in event planning, grace expressions of being.  Many times things don't go as they should but the goal is to work with other to accomplish it the best we can.  Some event planners yell, some get angry.  My coping mechanism is to "Breath" and get quiet.  To speak in quite tones to the workers who are already stressed.  "Grace" when things go wrong is so much better then adding stress to the situation.  Within a marriage it could be the one thing that puts out the fire of anger.  It is the one thing that has stopped the feelings of regret.  Words said in anger are not easily forgotten.  You through grace in them and the words no longer exist.  The husband, the wife, the child, then has to consider what their words and actions mean to the person they are showing them too.

We can persecute, we can remember all of the bad things, however what would happen if in that situation you show GRACE?  It doesn't solve all the problems and it won't event prevent them.  What it will do, is let you live in peace with yourself.  Within  a marriage living at peace with oneself is half the battle.

On that day when you need to plan your wedding, event or meeting, call us toll free.  I will still charge you the regular rate, but I will try to show you grace...MK Pure Diamond Events  (866) 421-1529  http://www.mkpurediamondevents.com or go to http://www.diamondoccurrence.com fill out the appointment form and I will call you.

Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Hope

I was talking with my pastor once and he asked what is it you enjoy doing?  I answered praying with people.  He asked; "Why?  I answered because if they pray, they have "Hope".  I learned hope in a different way then my children did, and their children will have a different way of looking at it then they do.  I looked it up in the Urban Dictionary.  The dictionary were those that use it can define what the word is.  Trendy don't you think?
  The high tec world has added a whole new dimension to the definitions of words.  As we change the world changes as the world changes we change.  Hope was once an expression of what we wanted, dreamed of, experienced in our relationships.  It was not just a word it was what we gave one another.  We even saw our elderly as hope.  Today business does not allow us to reflex on the things hoped for.

Hope defined:  Urban Dictionary: 

(The dictionary definitions have not been altered from original)
1.

Hope
Mankind’s greatest weakness and greatest strength.
Hope gave James the power to go on; but it would not let him admit defeat.

2.Hope
A sweet girl who has a lot going for her. She's funny and smart. She talks a lot, but thats cause she has a lot to say. She is an easy target to be made fun of, but thats because people love her so much! She's just down right awesome!
Jeeze!!! Look at that hope!
3.Hope
A very beautiful name.

Means Hope is an outgoing person. Hope always keeps people'e heads up. you definitly need to meet a Hope.
Hope just made me smile today!

Modern Dictionary: 

 hope
noun
1.
the feeling that what is wanted can be had or that events will turn out for the best: to give up hope.
2.
a particular instance of this feeling: the hope of winning.
3.
grounds for this feeling in a particular instance: There is little or no hope of his recovery.
4.
a person or thing in which expectations are centered: The medicine was her last hope.
5.
something that is hoped for: Her forgiveness is my constant hope.

Bible:  the bible

Taken from Blue Letter Bible
It has many verses on hope, but within a marriage it is these prayerful ones that shoudl be thought of in the most difficult of times.
Psa 16:9 Therefore my heart 3820 is glad 8055, and my glory 3519 rejoiceth 1523: my flesh 1320 also shall rest 7931 in hope 983.
Psa 22:9 But thou [art] he that took 1518 me out of the womb 990: thou didst make me hope 982 [when I was] upon my mother's 517 breasts 7699.
Psa 31:24 Be of good courage 2388, and he shall strengthen 553 your heart 3824, all ye that hope 3176 in the LORD 3068.
Psa 33:18 Behold, the eye 5869 of the LORD 3068 [is] upon them that fear 3373 him, upon them that hope 3176 in his mercy 2617;
Psa 33:22 Let thy mercy 2617, O LORD 3068, be upon us, according as we hope 3176 in thee.
Psa 38:15 For in thee, O LORD 3068, do I hope 3176: thou wilt hear 6030, O Lord 136 my God 430.
Psa 39:7 And now, Lord 136, what wait 6960 I for? my hope 8431 [is] in thee.

Psa 42:5Why art thou cast down 7817, O my soul 5315? and [why] art thou disquieted 1993 in me? hope 3176 thou in God for I shall yet praise 3034 him [for] the help 3444 of his countenance 6440.
                                                                                                                                                                              
 Is this a solution to everything?  No.  It could be the most wonderful beginning between two individuals.  If both people entering a marriage understand, that their main goal is to give each other hope.  Show each other grace, mercy and understanding when ever possible grace, then yes it will be a relationship worth others speaking about.

"Mrs. Clinton once said it take a village to raise a child."  although as a former preschool director I didn't agree with this, I didn't understand her point or like how it affected the youth in our school.  If she meant it takes having people around us that will help us maintain our value system, our believe system and the things we hope for then I agree.

Event planners, wedding planners help try to uphold the marriage relationships.  Again I state, it is a one marriage, two individuals. We, if possible will help the couple with the decisions they will remember for a lifetime.  If the wedding is a success they give credit to us, but it is really them working as a couple, if it is a failure they give credit to us, but again it is them working together as a couple.  My goal is to get the couple to work together, decide things together, make sure the group is working together.

www.mkpurediamondevents.com

Monday, October 22, 2012

Say "Yes" to the Celebrations

                                
I love this business.  I get to meet the most interesting people, sometimes I am blessed with sharing in their personal celebrations.  They can be all the traditional America Holidays, Personal Celebrations and sometimes Religious ones.  Some of the greatest blessing in life are when you get the unexpected.  Some might ask what is it.  What is the unexpected. The unexpected is that client that takes the time and care to help you learn about the difference in their culture.                                                                                         
                                                           


Yes, they might be celebrating an American or Religious Holiday, but the blessing comes in when they teach you the tradition of it.  I remember one client who was celebrating her husbands graduation from college.  But they didn't celebration totally the American way.  They had the usually catered dinner, but they couples brought desserts from their culture.  The table was filled with all the goodies of their culture.  This event planner discovered some cultures do not drink, soft drinks, no one wanted alcoholic drinks and yes, they were all free.  The client wanted her guest to have all they could eat and drink.  Tea is made in these special tea pots that don't look like coffee pots or our American tea pots.  They were the thing that got the conversation started.  Who would of thought tea would get people excited and talking.  The funny part sometimes event planners learn as the event evolves during the evening.  It was one of those times the client asked for an extra table for an extra table.  Little did I know that the tea pots stood about 3 feet high.  Little did I know that you can over cook the tea and it would boil all over.  It was this different but beautiful machine that looked to be years old, but new, braze, but maybe bronze.  It was a lovely machine.  I don't know why it left such and impression on my mined.  Maybe cause I was embarrassed, or maybe because I just had to ask the client for help. Humbling myself before my client.  I was the professional at the job right?   It is always my goal as an event planners goal to have the client feel the evening is worry free.  I had to trouble her for the details. Even then her friends stepped in to save the day.  They even went in the kitchen to try to teach my staff how to set up and take care of them.  They were very kind about it.  It also took my staff by surprise as well.  We all laugh afterwords and because it was such a complicated event, I took them out to dinner.  The tea pot was not the only complication, but the Celebration was just that.  A celebration they will always remember. Most of the complications happened without the client noticing.  That is always my goal.  (This is what it kind of looked like.  Wish I would have had the photographer taken a picture)  Good memories, good times.  Great Staff!)

Say Yes to the Celebrations!  MK Pure Diamond Events, we help you make your dreams come true.  Yes, to Holiday Celebrations! Yes to Personal Celebrations! Yes to Business Celebrations!  Isn't it time you get your Name in Fame.  It's a Diamond Occurrence!   
                                                                                                                                               
                                                             

Tuesday, October 16, 2012

"The Fight " (FOR THOSE THAT FIGHT A GOOD FIGHT)

Women fight many battles in life.  When we are teens we want to be nothing like our mom, just like men we want to be better!  We educate ourselves.  But the one thing we have in common is "The Fight".  We are all individuals in our own battle, some of us have families that support us and some of us have families of our choosing.  I was the later.  I am the one they call when the family is in trouble.  Tired of this I decided to have a life of my own.  Somewhere in between having children and being employed, I decided I was worth something, even if it wasn't a value my husband could see.

I saw myself as a good mother, a good friend and a loyal wife.  He didn't see me that way.  He saw me different.  I made peace with myself about how he saw me.  I think what helped was being at cause I was at peace  his mom and my mom.  The fight is not with those we love, but the battle is sometimes who we will be, become.  My battle stopped when I made peace within myself, that I was not like my mom, and I was not like my mother-in-law.  I was an individual with individual feelings and experiences.  The thing we did have in common was that we are/were all women.  Each of us choose to marry as virgins and we each have had our battles in life.  I told you earlier we become the battle.  The battle for others to fight, we want them to live, we want them to fight.  In giving them hope we battle our own dobt, fears, inabilities.  We accidently battle those we are trying to help or those trying to help us.  It no longer mattered what my husband now my ex-husband thought of me.  What mattered was that it was okay to battle for those we love, He made me in His own way.  I loved him the best I could, even if it wasn't good enough for him.  His inability was not mine. We were all created to be individuals, to have the feels, strengths and weakness we have.  Overcoming fears, understanding other women, during times of change, we understand ourselves better.   I am at peace knowing I did the best I could.  I know that I am not perfect.  I also know that we can only help the ones that want to be helped.

What I am not at peace with is the fight as women we all have in the fight against breast cancer.  This year I lost my mother in law to breast cancer.  In many ways I lost the battle of a life time.  Divorce just added to the loss.  Upholding someone who is sick teaches us so much about the little things in life and their importance.  It's not the first time I have joined the fight.  In the past I have lost several good friends.  Every year I use to walk in a "Relay for Life" www.relayforlife.org in memory of my girlfriends.  One of the elder's wife, the other a labor for a church school I worked at once.  The three of us worked along side one another in the preschool.  I was heart broken when I witnessed the devastation cancer had on their families.  The elders wife lives today and I like to think of her as happy with the results of modern medicine.

My mother in law was this person who use to make me laugh.  She was always there to help, all I had to do was ask.  It wasn't always like that.  When we first got married, she brought her share of adversity into our marriage as did my own mother. Every mom wants the best for their child.  That why I say things change as a women matures. We can see, things and understand things from a women's point of view.  The devastation the loss of a mom brings is like non-other. 

I morn the loss of my mother in law, Michico Kamon, who will always be loved.  Her wisdom, understanding of her son, helped me throughout my married years with him.  She was kind, loyal, understanding a good friend to everyone.  She is a Beloved Mother, Mother-in-law, daughter, and sister.  Her grandchildren adored her and she will always be known as a women who was always there for her family.  She will also be known as the grandmother who always had homemade goodies for the grandchildren when they went to visit her.

In honor of Michico Kamon, Past Present and Future Pendant is being sole.
 http://store.diamondoccurrence.com/jewelry/necklace
 During the month of October, breast cancer awareness month, I ask of you two thing.
1. CHECK YOUR BOOBIES   http://vimeo.com/23097280   
2. Call us or order your pendant, help "The Fight"

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