Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The New Addiction

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls;

This is the age of the new addiction. We see it on all the reality television. What is it? Could it be you are holding it in your hand. Lets talk a little about what is addiction.

Addiction is defined as:
the fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity.

In the twenties (1920's) it was Alcohol.
  In the thirties (1930's) it was Morphine.
    In the forties (1940's) it was Opinite
      In the fifties (1950's) it was Narcotics or Prescription Drugs
        In the sixties (1960's) it was Pharmaceuticals
          In the seventies (1970's) it was Heroine
           In the eighties (1980's) it was Cocaine
             In the nineties (1990's) it was Cocaine and Heroine
              In the two thousand's (2000's) it was buprenorphine
                In the two thousand ten (2010's) it is Internet aka "Smart Phones"

Now, I know you think I am being ridiculous. The smart phone the greatest invention to men. It gives us instant information. It is so helpful, we can reach our family and friends at any time. I confess I have even used it in my business constantly try to get more business. Now I have come to the realization checking my messages constantly isn't the best for my mental health.

Brides can call me with their problems and I will try to answer them. However, my practice is to plan out when I am going to answer my emails, text messages and other information. I do search the internet for immediate answers when I don't know it. I do confess to even trying to answer a trivia contest by searching the internet only to discover that other were faster at it then I am.

I have now done some things to protect myself. My facebook, twitter, and other social media sounds are turned off. I check it once or twice a day to see if there is something I need to follow up on. I no longer check in all the time...honestly, I don't need you knowing everywhere I go. I like living a private life. Letting people know who your with, what you're doing, and what your doing can attract the wrong kind of person. The way I look at it is I am not making a salary that movie stars make wo what is the point of letting you know what I am doing unless you're going to pick up the tab for me. I don't need to be your porn star. I need to financially support myself.

How to break the addiction. Event planners are doing this for couple and others. Asking people to turn off their smart phones at their events. To concentrate on the moment. Pastors use to ask people to turn off their smart phones until they decided to be with the trends instead of stick to the word of God. I know there are bible apps that are just as good. I've heard. Nothing compares to having a good book in your hands and reading it. They encouraged people to open up their bible and read. It encourages us to read more than a few words, something we all need to improve on is reading skills.

Here are some steps you can take to Stop the Addiction this was take from Dr. Phil:

Seven Steps to Breaking Your Addiction

Most people make resolutions at the beginning of the year, only to break them before the month is over. Whether you want to stop drinking, quit smoking, gambling or simply spend less time on the computer, Dr. Phil has advice.

1) Acknowledge the purpose.
Why do you do it? You have to be able to answer that question. Is it to help you deal with anxiety and stress? It may be hard for you to admit that you have a drinking or smoking habit, but you can't change what you don't acknowledge. Dr. Phil says, "What purpose does the behavior serve for you? If you're an alcoholic, you're not just drinking because you're thirsty. Admit to yourself: 'I'm medicating myself for anxiety, depression and pain. It numbs me to life.'"

2) Think rational thoughts instead of denial. 
You understand at a conscious level, at an intellectual level that your addiction is unhealthy, yet you continue and this perplexes you. Dr. Phil points out, "If you're in denial about it, if you're minimizing it, if you're trivializing it, if you're conning yourself about it, then you'll never get where you need to be." If you can't get through the day without a shot of vodka, you may be medicating yourself for anxiety, depression or pain. You may need to count on others to help you think rationally. 

3) Use alternative coping skills. People don't break bad habits; they replace them with new ones. Recognize that you get a reward from smoking or drinking. Dr. Phil explains, "It calms you. It takes your anxiety away. It lifts your spirits. It numbs you to the pain of your life. If I take that away from you and then don't put anything in its place, then you're just there stripped of your coping mechanisms and you're going to go back to what you were doing before." Some alternative techniques to consider to replace your addiction are breathing exercises or relaxation techniques. 

4) Identify your danger zones.
A danger zone can be a particular time of day or your reaction to a particular circumstance. There are times that you're more prone to indulge in your habit than others. Recognize what those times are, and do something that is incompatible with the addiction you're trying to break. For example, if you have the urge to light up during your 3 p.m. break at work, take that time to do your breathing or relaxation exercises instead. Dr. Phil encourages, "If you get through that two or three moments of impulse, I promise you it will go away." You don't have to be strong and powerful all day long every day. You just need to recognize your danger zones, and do something incompatible with your addiction.

5) Make lifestyle changes."It's not willpower, it's programming," Dr. Phil says. You have to set your life up for success if you're going to break your addiction. If you're trying to stop smoking or drinking, try simple things like not carrying money for cigarette vending machines or cleaning your cupboards of alcoholic beverages. You may have to change the places you frequent, what you do for fun and whom you hang out with. If you are a computer junkie, remove the computer from your house. The best way to stop an addiction is to not have access to it.

6) Be accountable and have a support system.
Being accountable to someone means that that person will not only support you, but will give you the kick in the rear that you need when it gets tough and tell you the truth when you're kidding yourself. Get your family and friends involved in your efforts to kick the habit. If you're a smoker, print out these cards from Dr. Phil that warn your friends to refrain from indulging you. You can also find addiction support on the message boards at You need to find a community that supports you during this time and embraces your decision to be healthier. You may also need to seek treatment or check into a rehabilitative program.

7) Reward yourself.Overcoming an addiction can be very difficult, but it can be done. When you see yourself making progress, even baby steps, you have to motivate yourself to keep going. Give yourself credit. Reward yourself for every step you make, starting with admitting that you have a problem and asking for help.

If you enjoyed reading this please click on a sponsor and email me your thoughts. I understand it is one of those you don't want to think about! What about your children?

Monday, July 14, 2014

What is Required?

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls,

Maybe you can relate to what I am about to write. Maybe not. It depends on where your stand is in life. What is required of me? (Hew 5:3) Have you ever had someone require something of you that so over the top you with sorrow (Jer 8:8) that you couldn't function correctly or think for yourself to answer?

At the time I had just lost my aunt, my Tia as we called she. She had passed away. At the same time or shortly after I discovered my own mom was aging and it would be a slow and long time with her and her husband they both are ill and slowly leaving. All I could think of was my own children, how would I manage a life without. How I would financially support them and myself. How I would survive?

I was attending a church I loved with people I loved. It was all overwhelming. (Job 6:27) My earthly father had already died and this left me feeling alone. I thank the Lord for taking the place of my father during times of need.  I was serving under someone we had philosophical fundamental differences. (1Cor12:5) Differences of how a woman should be. I believe women have a voice in church and church life. (Ps 142:1) I also believe in a woman's right to choice. (Jer 25:10) I believe woman's right to employment. Most of the woman in the Bible are employed. I also believe in a woman's right to be respected. I also believe that if you are personally required to serve under a preacher as a woman I have the right to ask his wife if there is any objection. (Eph 6:7)  If there is then we have to work our differences first. (1Cor7:34) If there was no disagreement and she still says no, then I am free to not serve as in my case. If they can't be worked out then I shouldn't serve under her husband. If what she required is greater than I am willing to give or capable of giving I have the freedom to say NO. My requirement was that the wife approve. (Ps (62:12) Why, serving in a church creates many things positive. The one thing I will not allow it to create is false relationship. It is important for the intentions of the heart to be known from all present, boundaries to be respected and believes to be challenged and mature in the Lord. (Jer 30-24)

 This choice was shocking to a man who believed a woman should submit. We argued constantly. Maybe, I didn't require enough of him, either way I know I still have the same stand today. The greatest part is knowing in my heart grace, superseded all the arguments. Prayer takes care of all answers, knowing the will of God will be done, not of man. I was there for a reason, a purpose and because I was called to be there.

Did I require anything else after that I don't think so. Once my personal world began to fall apart I had to step down from serving and take care of my family that needed me to serve them for a while. I am a woman with an opinion. Not that my opinion is always correct, what is important is that I am allowed to express it.

With the life changes, it is good to know you have another woman praying for grace and mercy in your life.

Hope in 2020!

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