Wednesday, July 23, 2014

The New Addiction

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls;



This is the age of the new addiction. We see it on all the reality television. What is it? Could it be you are holding it in your hand. Lets talk a little about what is addiction.

Addiction is defined as:
the fact or condition of being addicted to a particular substance, thing, or activity.

In the twenties (1920's) it was Alcohol.
  In the thirties (1930's) it was Morphine.
    In the forties (1940's) it was Opinite
      In the fifties (1950's) it was Narcotics or Prescription Drugs
        In the sixties (1960's) it was Pharmaceuticals
          In the seventies (1970's) it was Heroine
           In the eighties (1980's) it was Cocaine
             In the nineties (1990's) it was Cocaine and Heroine
              In the two thousand's (2000's) it was buprenorphine
                In the two thousand ten (2010's) it is Internet aka "Smart Phones"


Now, I know you think I am being ridiculous. The smart phone the greatest invention to men. It gives us instant information. It is so helpful, we can reach our family and friends at any time. I confess I have even used it in my business constantly try to get more business. Now I have come to the realization checking my messages constantly isn't the best for my mental health.

Brides can call me with their problems and I will try to answer them. However, my practice is to plan out when I am going to answer my emails, text messages and other information. I do search the internet for immediate answers when I don't know it. I do confess to even trying to answer a trivia contest by searching the internet only to discover that other were faster at it then I am.

I have now done some things to protect myself. My facebook, twitter, and other social media sounds are turned off. I check it once or twice a day to see if there is something I need to follow up on. I no longer check in all the time...honestly, I don't need you knowing everywhere I go. I like living a private life. Letting people know who your with, what you're doing, and what your doing can attract the wrong kind of person. The way I look at it is I am not making a salary that movie stars make wo what is the point of letting you know what I am doing unless you're going to pick up the tab for me. I don't need to be your porn star. I need to financially support myself.

How to break the addiction. Event planners are doing this for couple and others. Asking people to turn off their smart phones at their events. To concentrate on the moment. Pastors use to ask people to turn off their smart phones until they decided to be with the trends instead of stick to the word of God. I know there are bible apps that are just as good. I've heard. Nothing compares to having a good book in your hands and reading it. They encouraged people to open up their bible and read. It encourages us to read more than a few words, something we all need to improve on is reading skills.

Here are some steps you can take to Stop the Addiction this was take from Dr. Phil:


Seven Steps to Breaking Your Addiction


Most people make resolutions at the beginning of the year, only to break them before the month is over. Whether you want to stop drinking, quit smoking, gambling or simply spend less time on the computer, Dr. Phil has advice.

1) Acknowledge the purpose.
Why do you do it? You have to be able to answer that question. Is it to help you deal with anxiety and stress? It may be hard for you to admit that you have a drinking or smoking habit, but you can't change what you don't acknowledge. Dr. Phil says, "What purpose does the behavior serve for you? If you're an alcoholic, you're not just drinking because you're thirsty. Admit to yourself: 'I'm medicating myself for anxiety, depression and pain. It numbs me to life.'"

2) Think rational thoughts instead of denial. 
You understand at a conscious level, at an intellectual level that your addiction is unhealthy, yet you continue and this perplexes you. Dr. Phil points out, "If you're in denial about it, if you're minimizing it, if you're trivializing it, if you're conning yourself about it, then you'll never get where you need to be." If you can't get through the day without a shot of vodka, you may be medicating yourself for anxiety, depression or pain. You may need to count on others to help you think rationally. 

3) Use alternative coping skills. People don't break bad habits; they replace them with new ones. Recognize that you get a reward from smoking or drinking. Dr. Phil explains, "It calms you. It takes your anxiety away. It lifts your spirits. It numbs you to the pain of your life. If I take that away from you and then don't put anything in its place, then you're just there stripped of your coping mechanisms and you're going to go back to what you were doing before." Some alternative techniques to consider to replace your addiction are breathing exercises or relaxation techniques. 

4) Identify your danger zones.
A danger zone can be a particular time of day or your reaction to a particular circumstance. There are times that you're more prone to indulge in your habit than others. Recognize what those times are, and do something that is incompatible with the addiction you're trying to break. For example, if you have the urge to light up during your 3 p.m. break at work, take that time to do your breathing or relaxation exercises instead. Dr. Phil encourages, "If you get through that two or three moments of impulse, I promise you it will go away." You don't have to be strong and powerful all day long every day. You just need to recognize your danger zones, and do something incompatible with your addiction.

5) Make lifestyle changes."It's not willpower, it's programming," Dr. Phil says. You have to set your life up for success if you're going to break your addiction. If you're trying to stop smoking or drinking, try simple things like not carrying money for cigarette vending machines or cleaning your cupboards of alcoholic beverages. You may have to change the places you frequent, what you do for fun and whom you hang out with. If you are a computer junkie, remove the computer from your house. The best way to stop an addiction is to not have access to it.

6) Be accountable and have a support system.
Being accountable to someone means that that person will not only support you, but will give you the kick in the rear that you need when it gets tough and tell you the truth when you're kidding yourself. Get your family and friends involved in your efforts to kick the habit. If you're a smoker, print out these cards from Dr. Phil that warn your friends to refrain from indulging you. You can also find addiction support on the message boards at DrPhil.com. You need to find a community that supports you during this time and embraces your decision to be healthier. You may also need to seek treatment or check into a rehabilitative program.

7) Reward yourself.Overcoming an addiction can be very difficult, but it can be done. When you see yourself making progress, even baby steps, you have to motivate yourself to keep going. Give yourself credit. Reward yourself for every step you make, starting with admitting that you have a problem and asking for help.
http://www.drphil.com/articles/article/173

If you enjoyed reading this please click on a sponsor and email me your thoughts. I understand it is one of those you don't want to think about! What about your children?

Monday, July 14, 2014

What is Required?

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls,

Maybe you can relate to what I am about to write. Maybe not. It depends on where your stand is in life. What is required of me? (Hew 5:3) Have you ever had someone require something of you that so over the top you with sorrow (Jer 8:8) that you couldn't function correctly or think for yourself to answer?

At the time I had just lost my aunt, my Tia as we called she. She had passed away. At the same time or shortly after I discovered my own mom was aging and it would be a slow and long time with her and her husband they both are ill and slowly leaving. All I could think of was my own children, how would I manage a life without. How I would financially support them and myself. How I would survive?

I was attending a church I loved with people I loved. It was all overwhelming. (Job 6:27) My earthly father had already died and this left me feeling alone. I thank the Lord for taking the place of my father during times of need.  I was serving under someone we had philosophical fundamental differences. (1Cor12:5) Differences of how a woman should be. I believe women have a voice in church and church life. (Ps 142:1) I also believe in a woman's right to choice. (Jer 25:10) I believe woman's right to employment. Most of the woman in the Bible are employed. I also believe in a woman's right to be respected. I also believe that if you are personally required to serve under a preacher as a woman I have the right to ask his wife if there is any objection. (Eph 6:7)  If there is then we have to work our differences first. (1Cor7:34) If there was no disagreement and she still says no, then I am free to not serve as in my case. If they can't be worked out then I shouldn't serve under her husband. If what she required is greater than I am willing to give or capable of giving I have the freedom to say NO. My requirement was that the wife approve. (Ps (62:12) Why, serving in a church creates many things positive. The one thing I will not allow it to create is false relationship. It is important for the intentions of the heart to be known from all present, boundaries to be respected and believes to be challenged and mature in the Lord. (Jer 30-24)

 This choice was shocking to a man who believed a woman should submit. We argued constantly. Maybe, I didn't require enough of him, either way I know I still have the same stand today. The greatest part is knowing in my heart grace, superseded all the arguments. Prayer takes care of all answers, knowing the will of God will be done, not of man. I was there for a reason, a purpose and because I was called to be there.

Did I require anything else after that I don't think so. Once my personal world began to fall apart I had to step down from serving and take care of my family that needed me to serve them for a while. I am a woman with an opinion. Not that my opinion is always correct, what is important is that I am allowed to express it.

With the life changes, it is good to know you have another woman praying for grace and mercy in your life.


Wednesday, June 25, 2014

I Look A Mess I Don't Have Anything To Hide

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls,

As woman we fight all kinds of battle. Some for ourselves to stay content and give thanksgiving in everything the God brings our way, others just because we are selfish enough to want to live a life that God intended us to live. Most of all we fight the battle because this is what we are told we must do.

There is no battle when you are signal, other than the one to have your own name, reputation, honor in your own body, earned respect of others, in your business life and in your personal life. What greater battle is there than in knowing the truth. I do not fight when I wake up in the morning for I know the truth in my life. I fight to be the woman God intended me to by. Not my mothers child, the woman he raised me up to be.

Number one on Googles list of woman who look a mess.Did someone care enough to ask her why?
Sometimes, we don't look like what we are suppose to look like. We run to the grocery store for something and we run into a friend. Wow, they say, you don't look like yourself. I laugh and think to myself what is it that you were expecting? You see me on Sunday, workdays with my best forward, however on a regular day when I am just myself it is unacceptable to you?  This thought runs through my mind, however I don't speak it. It is a thought not worth speaking. I think, if I were a negative person I would tell you all the things I am trying to accomplish, however I am just myself, trying to support myself. Trying to live the life I was suppose to live not the lies others want for me.

It is the truth of day to day life, we doesn't always look the way others think it should. We don't always act life others want us to. Social media, expects woman to look a certain way, our children expect us "mom" to look and act a certain way, movies portray woman without faults. The truth is we suffer from all types of life circumstances. We fluctuate the ups and down's of life know their is a greater purpose to our life then what you expect. We woman don't have to look any certain way. God describes Eve, however he doesn't describe her physical appears other than to say she came from the rib of Adam. Sometimes, I hear what you say, however the freedom is knowing what is best, God's best for my life. Not your life, my life. If I was a preacher I would tell you God wants all His people to know that Jesus Christ is Lord. That you are saved by grace and not by works. That you are a believer. When you accept the fact that there is John 3:16. The goal is to believe everyday, act that way and accept grace. Giving thanks always. I might not look like you expect, however I believe I am doing the best I can.

However, I am not a preacher, therefore I can only ask you the next time you see me, don't judge by my appearance. Ask me as a person how am I doing and if you really want to know and care for me I will tell you. Otherwise just say hello and be on your way. Only my true friends, family need to know the reality of my life. That is the difference between a relationship and a gossip.

Tuesday, June 24, 2014

Trending in Weddings (No to Social Media at My Event)

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls:

You know I love to talk about trends whenever possible. The funniest one right now in the trendy field of event planning is putting away the cellphones and all the trendy tweets, Instagram etc. and asking people to be with you in the moment. What a thought, that you share the most important moment in your life with the guest you have invited.
Cell Phone Case @MKPDE

As your guest nicely to put away their cell phones, cameras anything that can take away a single moment of your guest spending time with you. The thing is it is difficult to ask people today to not take pictures at your wedding. Is this because we are use to capturing things in our own way or because we have just become a society, that needs to talk about yourself constantly?

I have thought about our world today and what is important to individuals, even at a wedding. Most people tend to take pictures and post them right away. So their friends can know what they are doing. Is it really about the wedding, the couple the commitment they are making to one another or is it about or is it about the guest attend, trying to make their friends jealous, covet, desire what they have? Whatever the motive, you have spend hundreds, thousands of dollars on your day. You're about to say your vow and you hear the clicking of cameras. The worse part is at the reception, your having a good time and what is an innocent moment, someone takes a picture and it becomes something that didn't happen. How do you explain a picture away, when a picture spends a thousand words.

Here suggestions of ways you can ask your guest in a polite manner:

1. Include a note in your wedding invitation. "We would like you to be in the moment with us on this special day, in order to accomplish this we are asking our guest to please not use their cell phones, please leave it at home or check it in. We do not want our photo, our wedding on the Internet."

2. Have a check in area with receptionist. . Since we are serving alcohol at our wedding we are asking out guest to please turn in their keys and cell phones. Respecting privacy is very important to us. We prefer our wedding or event not be on the Internet."

3. Thank you for respecting our privacy and the privacy of our guest, please do not take pictures and put our day on social media. We would like to keep this day private between us and our guest.

4. Today we invite you into one of the most Romantic Days of our lives. Please respect our day by not taking pictures and putting it in social media.




Saturday, June 14, 2014

Gossip Hated and Loved!

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls,

You know it is amazing to me the perception of gossip. In a biblical term gossip is hated, the thing is we assume it is only women who do (secretly) speak of these things. Prayer is gossip? However, even in a church men need to pray, do they go to other men to pray with them or a woman? If women are gossiping when they are praying for one another then what are men doing when they pray for one another?

Either way, I went on a journey once to find out how much gossip was hated. I traveled in tents, by car, boat, plane and even under the sea asking the question how much do you hate gossip. Here is what I found out.

Movie stars do it.
Photographers do it.
Videographers do it.
Passengers do it.
Starbucks was knowing for doing it with anonymous names on cups so they do it.
Pizza deliveries boys do it.
Tweeters do it.
Face book ruined faces and do it?
Event planners do it and it ruins their employment.
Teachers do it.
Principles do it.
Pastors do it.
Headmasters do it.
Chefs do it.
Fashion designers do it and claim they would never do it.
Lawyers do it knowing there's consequences for doing it.
Judges do it.
Literary do it.


Here is what I found out in my Journey...it doesn't matter the color of your skin, it doesn't matter if you are male or female, it doesn't matter how old you are, it doesn't matter how powerful you are or how much money you have or don't have, people gossip,

What does matter is how you use the gossip. I am here to say it does. When you're a child you think and act like a child. You do things you enjoy, however you don't know what you enjoy because you are a child and haven't experience all that there is to do. Innocence should be protected, you as a individual have the right to learn, grow mature and figure out what is yours. What is right for you.

How do you use gossip? When I was in college just starting my life, I attended a football game with my fiance. We were watching the game and I always took other things to do. His profession was "football" and the other coaches would always attend. They talked about football plays, the talents of the football player the statistics and I would talk about the cheerleaders. I laugh today at the thoughts I had I had just graduated from high school and x-cheerleader I still had the desire to try cheer. I would mess up these men by talking about the cheerleaders. It was intentional and unintentional on my part. Therefore, our date nights were filled with sports, as my then young fiance was learning from his peers and I was the tag along. They would laugh and joke with me about how I always brought a book, a craft project or something to do. I quickly learn to cost them money and make them buy be a program, a hot dog, a coke....did you know that when they began to gossip about the cheerleader, I would have to distract these grown up men with other things. I laugh today, it was not anger it was to see who can mess up whom. There came the point where cheerleader tryouts and I happened to be on campus. I thought to myself, I could tryout for cheerleader and mess with my fiance or I could just do what I needed to do to graduate from college. I choose to graduate from college. There is a point, where messing with a life is for their benefit or their failure. I believe I made the right choice for my life. A few of my girlfriends became cheerleaders. It was fun to watch them, I went on with my education and graduated from university.

Is gossip fun or does it have a responsibility? I could of not keep my fiance on track and tempted him with cheerleaders as his friends were doing with me, tempting me with football players. I could have just gone down to the football field after the football game and introduced myself to the young man they wanted me to meet. I think I made the right choice to love the man I was engaged to and ignore the others. There is always someone out there that is prettier or more handsome, has more money, is more powerful, however when you find the one that makes you feel all those things and you don't have a thing your both just starting off, then that just might be the one to spend your life with.  Yes, I can scripture this blog....I won't. It's gossip.





Sunday, June 1, 2014

Flag Day What Does It Mean To You?

Hi there, Diamond Glamour Girls,

Have you ever thought about the flag of the United States of America?  Is is important to you? That holiday we call "Flag Day". What does it really mean to you? Most Americans, think very little of our flag on a daily bases. Here I am after my home was affected thinking about the flag our men and women fight for. To this day they still fight for this flag and all that it means.

Last night, one of our military that was impressed in a jail in Mexico was sent back to the United States. What rights do you have? Are you willing to give them up? Your home would you give that up? How about your car? Your children? Better yet your money would you give that up? The right to earn a living? These men and woman give some of these things up. They leave their homes, their cars, their families, and some even their paychecks why? To serve a country with a flag more powerful than all other countries. It use to be we were raised with a sense of duty and responsibility. We use to write to our POW's and seal their letters with a kiss. S.W.A. K.
Apple phones have this cute little app a letter with a kiss on it. I think to myself how many people today know what that means? It was a meaning symbolic of affection, love and a way of saying Thank You to those POW's of the "Viet Nam" war. They were are modern day heros. We didn't have to agree with the war they were fighting. We had to respect them because they were fighting a war, we were unable or unwilling to do. We were children! Innocent and a heart represented a KISS. Not lips. Not lipstick. Naive I hope so. I hope and pray every child is naive when it comes to things of war and they grow up feeling safe. Knowing we have people who fight for our country. Today's soldier should of had every government funded school, every christian school writing them letters, S.W.A.K. Shout! Thank You!

How many of our children today grow up making the United States Flag and learning what the stars and stripes mean. Why it is so important? This may be my personal agenda. Maybe, because I had a dad that served in the military, a grandfather that served in the military, his father before him and married a husband that served in the military. Maybe it is I am a teacher and miss teaching. I think these things played a part in my life, what played a larger part was knowing what the stars and stripes mean and in learning this I learned the importance of these men/woman serving. In learning what the flag means I learned our country faith, our ability to defend, our rights, how carefully our forefathers choose the design. I learned why other nations choose their design, their believes, their faith, what God they pray to and how they choose the design. The meaning of symbolism and how to stand firm in what I believe.

 That is still not why it is important. It is important, to know those who walked before us and what they fought for. What meant so much that they would give up their live for this cause, for me a citizen in this United States of America. Could it be that our forefathers worshiped the only true God? That is why we are blessed. (John 17:3)

This Flag Day talk to your child about what it means. Many San Diegans lost their homes to fire this year, who came in to help them fight..."American Hero's" from fighter fighters, to military to the person next door. It doesn't get much better than that on earth.

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