Old Friend's New Life (Transition to Couplehood)

A new beginning always beginning, starting with communication, known expectations, and understanding of what you are trying to achieve as a couple.  The list should be reviewed every year, change according to what has been achieved add new things of what you would like to achieve.  For the first year here is a list of 12 things you can do to ease the transition into couplehood.

It's after the wedding, you on your honeymoon, all the two of you can talk about was how wonderful the wedding was, how great your wedding planner was and how all the wedding plans came true.  Your guest were happy, you were happy you had fun.  Now it is all about the future and how wonderful your life will be together.  What is it really going to be like? 

A real dose of reality is when you get on the airplane to come home.  For some couples they come home to an overwhelming since of ....what would I call it?  Reality?  Panic?  The honeymoon is over what now?  For other couple it is more like the romance continues and they continue to grow their relations.  They were friends before the honeymoon they are friends afterwords.

Getting home from a honeymoon to all the day to day things can become somewhat challenging so here is a list of items you can do to help you adjust to your new lifestyle. Ease the stress of the everyday grind.  Back to work, back to life.  It's a little like going on vacation, everyone wants to know everything.  No matter what happened it is best to say wonderful things about your new spouse.  No need to open up the door for trouble.  Speaking highly of your new husband or wife helps you both work out any difference between you,  and keep it just between you.

1.  Find a place to live, before the honeymoon.  The best way is to find a place neither of you have lived in before so that their are no arguments about how to do things.  No reminders of past loves, etc. You are both starting with the same playing fields.

2.  Unwrap gifts that are delivered prior to the wedding.

3.  Send a thank you card to the people the gifts are from. (These can be ordered at the same time your invitations are order with from Mr. & Mrs. or Love, Mr & Mrs.  whatever the saying your would like) 
Then all you have to do is write thank you for the ......  If you are having an opening up the wedding gifts together party after the honeymoon, do it in your new place.
                                                                                   

4. Be sure to make a list of all gifts and person who gave it to you so you have a reference when you see them and they ask you did you like the gift we gave? Highly recommend you keep the list close for the first year. If you know you are going to see the people who you can refer to it prior to seeing them.
                                                                                                        

5. Try to move all your items that you want to keep to your new joint residence a month prior to your wedding. Decide who is going to live there.

6. Live in your own residence as long as possible, a week prior to the wedding the bride or groom should move into the new residence.  This way only one resident will have to be closed after your honeymoon.                                                                                                           

7. Donate any item that is the littlest argument (or big ones for that matter).  You are both starting a new life and if "he didn't like" or "she didn't like it.  It doesn't belong".

8. Your new life together is about the two of you.  The first year should be all about you two and planning for a life together.

9.  Get your finances in order.  Set goals.  (Met with a financial planner, insurance person to help you achieve your goals.)
I know this sounds silly but if you have you want children consider opening up a savings account.  There is a cost to having children, if you didn't have to spend the savings then it is a nice beginning to a college fund.  After the first is born do the same for the next one.  It doesn't have to be allot each month just something your financial planner can help with the details.  You do not have to be rich to have a financial planner.



10. Know and trust that transitions are normal, be patient, kind with one another.  The first year can be the reminder of all future anniversaries so make it fun.

11.  Slowly invite your friends over to see your new home, sometimes friends have difficulties with changes in you and the new you.  Know that this is also normal.  Try to love them through it, if they can't adjust then they will choose to fade out of your life.  Don't fight about it.  Your true friends are truly that, they will remain friends as you transition into marriedhoodness. 

12.  Don't forget to take time to be an individual.  There might be things you both love doing together but it is okay to have private interest.  As long as you are not violating the marriage vows then, enjoy the company of your friends.