Who Has Control of Your Ovaries? (Daughterhood)

In 1979 I was married to the man I had been dating since the age of fifteen.  I laugh not really, I had known him since that age but made him wait to date me for 2 (two) painful years. Were they really painful?  From his point of view yes, from my point of view no.  I wasn't old enough to date a man who was five (5) years older than me.  Was I prejudice...certainly not.  I was definitely wise enough to know I was not mature enough to date such a man. Yes, I saw him as a man.  It took time to get to know him.  What does that have to do with this story....well in finding someone Jesus want for you it takes time, prayer and knowing if he is a man of good character.  That is what it took that then twenty (20) year old to prove to me.  That he also had a firm foundation. During those two (2) years this man who was then a college student and teachers aide at the high school I attended was allowed certain things.

1. He could occasionally allowed to drive me home.

2. He was allowed to come to my house and visit.

People always ask the stupidest questions.  Did we kiss, how far did we go?  Yes we kissed. He had to wait.  Not until my senior year in high school did we (did I ) begin to start dating, allowing our dating  to be public.  During that time Goods and Bads happen to me.  Two of my friends shot themselves, I was robbed at gun point point twice working at a part-time job to pay for my cheerleading and drill team uniforms and camp.  Their is a testing to believing that  "Jesus is Lord" I talked with my school counselor constantly because I was being stocked by   someone I didn't know. I even took a telephone operator position in the principles office...Guess what the stocker called me there.  I am so grateful for school police cause they caught him calling me from the school phone booth.  He didn't know about everything that happened but he did not when I got robbed at gun point I was pretty shaken up and he and his family gave me the courage to report the crimes and well as resigned.  

Years later I married this man that proved many things to me.  "I will never regret marring him, not matter what happen later in life. The greatest of these was he stood by me and helped me every chance I got.  He didn't allow my family to stop me from getting an education or getting in our marriage.  He was a believer, like myself and we could both scripture and hold each other accountable which made for both a difficult marriage and one of quality.  Un-replaceable!

and "For this a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife and the two shall become one flesh." Matt 19:3  For this reason I plan weddings and do not meddle in the couples business. It is the gift God gave me to provide an income, during this time. This is what I will continue to try to do.    This is one of those scripture verses that I find now I am now to be interesting living another life, unknowing what it will bring. Knowing that my own mom, when I got married and arrived from my honey, went off and married a man I didn't know. She was too busy to attend our wedding gift opening dinner...Oh my God...the stories go on.  "Forgive and don't forget...is my thought you don't have to live the past again... Especially the rapes, the crimes and the violence you left in the past.

Here I am today divorced in her home with that man I still don't know trying to take care of them.  Him with Parkinson's, her with diabetes listen to her telling me to move out all the time knowing, I don't have the finances to do so. Knowing that I can't be her child, knowing what they want is impossible for me to do for them.  They do not believe what I believe.  They did not choose what I choose.  Their marriage was not what my marriage was about.  Do I curse her or love her just because she is the mom God gave me.  Knowing that what I am living is not God's best for me.  Too many people with different believe systems in a marriage is not a good thing.  The one thing that is a good thing is that no matter what happens "Jesus is Lord!"

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